My mom and I still go shopping together. I know many of you will think that’s sad, but let me tell you one thing: it’s hard to find a shopping buddy who will honestly tell you when you’re offending the Gods of Fashion. Think about it. Do you think your husband will answer the question “Does this make my butt look big?” with any degree of honesty at all? Not if he wants to stay married, right?

Well, I am discovering that it’s as hard or harder to find a writing buddy/critique partner who will tell you when your writing needs to lose a few pounds, or step onto the treadmill, or go back into the closet and start all over again. For one thing, those types of comments have to come from somewhere beyond friendship, from love and respect, and a deep desire to see the one whose work you’re critiquing succeed in a massive way. There are crit buddies, and there are crit buddies. And the good ones are the ones who sometimes make you cry… and sometimes make you write another thousand words in an afternoon.

That’s why I have decided I will do anything, up to and including donating a major organ, to keep my best crit buds happy.You know who you are, people, and now you know that you have me right where you want me: in your debt forever.

Just don’t tell me my essay is “fantastic” when it really needs to lose twenty adverbs.